In many ways this trip Helena and I are on is an exercise in faith. Not faith in a particular God or Deity, but in the process of life’s desire to unfold and experience itself. In the ultimate safety of trusting its call. If we are all miniscule but valued agents of this almighty unfoldment maybe our own deepest desires can lead us into the richest experiences of all?
In celebration of that theme I’ve just completed uploading a DJ mix to Mixcloud. You can listen to it by clicking below: https://www.mixcloud.com/freddyfever/follow-the-sun/
It’s a soulful and, of course, cheeky celebration of following your cross-continental dreams.
I’m always drawn West. The direction of the setting sun. It seems the industrious, the ordered, (at least in the UK and the new colonised nations) align with the eastern portions of continents – London vs Bristol, New York vs San Fran, Sydney vs Perth, Toronto vs Vancouver… There seems to me something wilder, something more magical about the West. In England the ancients knew it, studding the western lands with stone circles and ceremonial sites. I’m so excited about moving to Devon and embedding myself into that land, if it will take me.
But for now we have been holding a longitudinal line along the eastern edge of the Rockies. We’ve made it all the way up to Alberta, Canada, via Colorado and Montana – the land of the Big Sky as they call it.. Yellowstone was a revelation. 2.2 million acres of protected wilderness and surely one of the most gloriously diverse and beautiful, as well as bountiful (we saw bald eagles, bison, bears – black and grizzly – elk, chipmunks, marmots, woodpeckers, owls, blue mountain Jays, moose) natural areas in the world. Plus they have actual cowboys.
Before leaving the southwest we nipped (an understatement if ever there was one – an interstate drive is pretty much equivalent to crossing half our country!) across the New Mexican borderline to Arizona from because the Grand Canyon was calling us. It is incomprehensibly, INSANELY huge. It actually defied my perceptual abilites to process the vastness of it as we stood looking out across a canyon that is at times 16 miles wide and a mile deep.
I visited it a number of years ago on a short, sweet Mustang ride from Phoenix to San Francisco but because we (My friend Max and I) were in a rush (Halloween in Vegas, anyone?!) I didn’t get to spend any time with it beyond a brief hike below the rim. Consequently it didn’t make much of an impact on me. This time we allowed enough time to let its magnitude register. It was less than a week after holding the ceremony for Martin. There were unexpressed feelings bubbling up, and as I wandered along its almighty rim the canyon seemed to be boring a hole deep into my heart. These words came out (please forgive the spacing – another computer thing I’d love to know how to figure out!):
Torn open by the chisel-topped rivers of Time
Exposing near all of this ag’d Earth’s creation
The red, the rubble, the strata
The multiple layers of history’s data
The intricate carving of weakness in rock
It’s depth defying perception;
Her form is carving a hole in my heart,
Prising open its tiny secrets.
Tears are stinging my awe-opened eyes
As I witness God’s almighty treatise.
“I can do THIS. I am so big
That you can’t understand my true nature.
Instead, look on my carvings and weep.
Let your heart, not your mind, ascertain her.
The heart is the organ that sees with true sight
Your heart, ever silently beating.
Allow it to open its door to true sight
Allow it to depth-charge your feelings.
To do this you’ll have to unblock all the veins
That have clogged up with Life’s many mishaps.
So allow all the tears, and the hurt, and the hate
To be carried away by My waters.
I’ll chisel a canyon so deep in your heart
That you’ll know the true depths of your being,
And all of your pain will be carried away
Until you see as I’m seeing.
Imperfect perfection, human and real,
Embodied and here in duality –
Walking the tightrope of being in form
And holding a Spirit form-ality.
So Soar away on this bright Earth today
Witness the wonder…..weep hard.
Every emotion will whisper its part
In the great song of freedom, at last.